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Discreet Medication: 5 Tips On Getting Blazed While No One Knows

  Kali R  Feb 01, 2018

Morty Trippin Out

Source: Reddit

C’mon now, we’ve all been there before; that moment when you realize you’re too lit and have to “act natural” around your family, coworkers, or passing souls that come across your path. On the outside you put on a half smile, while on the inside, you’re alarm is going off like “they’re on to me, abort, abort, abort”.

Now picture this; getting lit without any one else knowing. Sounds great right, but how? Here are a few easy ways to stay medicated without anyone else catching on.

Tip #1 : Stay Hydrated

Hydration Matters!

Source: Giphy

This is easily by far the most underrated trick to staying lowkey and under the radar around NPC’s, and it is so, so simple. All you have to do, is drink water! Staying hydrated prevents things like cotton mouth, which in turn help you to clearly articulate yourself.

We know we have to drink water, but as people in our busy societies, do we ever ask ourselves, how much? Giving your body the water it needs also ensures for a smooth experience in life, without even involving weed. Cannabis triggers receptors in your brain to activate functions within our body, producing all of the wonderful feelings we have all come to know and love.

But even a medication as powerful as this one needs to be balanced, as all things in life must be. Staying hydrated keeps your body in natural equilibrium with itself, and even moreso when you’re blazed and needing to take in water to be able to keep yourself feeling good.

Hail Hydrate

Source: Imgur

Try to think equivalent exchange. You cannot get something without giving something up of equal or greater value. Eating works too, although studies have shown that if we do not stay hydrated throughout the day, our bodies will display signs of hunger, although they are just warning signals that you are actually thirsty. Either way make sure you drink enough water to satisfy your bodily requirements (there are many apps for this, check one out), and follow up with a nice snack.

Tip #2 : Satisfying the Munchies

Munchies Got Me Like

Source: Reddit

As did with Tip #1, Tip #2 also deals with balance in the body. Let’s be real, cannabis is very much so an appetite stimulant, but just as well can be an appetite suppressant. Consuming cannabis over cannabis without getting the proper nutrients from your munchies, and an adequate intake of water, produces a very dank, stagnant high, that more so often that not gives you the whole “uhhhhhh” stoner stereotype.

Stoned Patrick

Source: Giphy

This can be prevented by feeding your body wholesome goodness that allow for proper homeostasis within your vessel. Fruits and berries such as mangoes, apples, blueberries, and various melons, and many more all make for an excellent choice of munchie that are both refreshing due to their water content, and high in nutrients and antioxidants. Avocados are also a filling yet nutritious snack, packed with essential vitamins and minerals.

Of course, don’t feel bad if you opt for the classic pizza, fries, ice cream, cookies, or what have you. Just make sure you supplement lots of water and have a healthy meal later in the day.

Tip #3 : Look Alive There Bud

Lit Spongebob

Source: Wolf Mask Art

If you don’t already know, consuming cannabis can “lower” ones eyes, giving them a more relaxed appearance. Sometimes but not in every case, dry eye is also a symptom of being shmacked, giving the eyes a bit of a glossy red glow. Now, this totally doesn’t mean anything is wrong with the person, no, but preventing yourself from looking under any kind of influence will keep unwanted attention off you.

The easiest way to do this is regularly follow Tips #1 and #2, however you can also look a bit more alive with a little help from: eyedrops! Yes, eyedrops are an amazing way to get the glaze out your gaze and bring some clarity back to those red eyes of yours. Now the eyedrops won’t do much for looking and feeling good / relaxed, however it will draw back some of the attention from you being blitzed. No worries though, we have a few more pieces of advice before we’re done with this one.

Applying Eyedrops

Source: Giphy

Don’t be afraid to make eye contact, in fact do it. People don’t usually expect it, which is a good thing, because it conveys confidence that someone with something to hide wouldn’t normally display. Use that to your advantage; speak your mind and start conversations. Act like you always do, nobody will ever know a thing! Smiles are also quite contagious, and you’d be surprised how the fire from a single smile could light so many doobies.

Tip #4 : Deodorize!

That Smelly Smell

Source: Giphy

Probably the #1 reason why people get accused of being high, is that they smell like cannabis. Now joint smokers know this feeling all too well. Blaze up and walk in somewhere, and if the place isn’t well ventilated, or if its a small space, its a wrap for you there buddy. Heads will turn like the exorcist child, unless you take the proper precautions to blend in with the rest of gen. pop.

The easiest way to do this is to change out of your smokey clothes, and into fresh ones, washing your hands in the process. Grab some gum, or brush your teeth, hit up the first 3 tips and you’re golden Ponyboy. Now this may not be practical for everyone, so I definitely recommend using a eucalyptus or hyacinth hand sanitizer Both are neutral smells that won’t make it seem like you’re hiding something, while also helping to clear up dank hands that just handled some highgrade, but honestly, any hand sanitizer will do you some good, otherwise, Dawn is another great option.

Source: Giphy

Outside of hand sanitizer, there are a few companies, such as Kushley’s, that make natural deodorizers, so you don’t have to deal with a harsh chemical smell that scream “I’m trying to mask something”. If you’re in a pinch, spritz your wrists, neck, and general visage in a quick pass, and you should be good to go. My rule of thumb is whenever I finish consuming cannabis and I need to be around people who might notice, to air myself out before going wherever I have to go. A few minutes outside in the playground called Earth we all share, and you should be okay to go about your business.

Tip #5 : Don’t Stress, Think Positive, Find your Breath, and Just be You!

More than likely you’re already acting as normally as you always do. The moment you start to question yourself, is in reality, when you really start to make noticeable mistakes. The best way to prevent this is to always just take a second and check yourself, taking a deep breath, and in so finding its natural flow.

Once you’ve found your breath take a moment to check your feelings. If you’re feeling good, then that more than likely that means that you’re thinking good thoughts, but at the same time, if you’re feeling bad then that more than likely means you’re thinking bad thoughts.

Checking how we feel is the easiest way to get a handle on the thousands of thoughts we have a day. Once you know how you feel, you can then either accept or dismiss whatever thoughts are in the forefront of your mind; think of each thoughts as people passing you by as you sit on a metaphysical porch. If you see a friend, invite them to sit with you and enjoy their company in the creative process. However if they aren’t friends, allow them to pass as easily as a cloud adrift overhead, or a car driving on the opposite side of the road going somewhere else.

With a little positive reinforcement, and a practice of staying present in the moment by doing these checks and never getting wrapped up on a single thought, you can stay blazed without anyone ever knowing anything.  Doing things in your natural rhythm and just being yourself, is the honest trick to Tip #5.

If you go through this list as a little mental note every time you get high, you can discreetly medicate without anyone knowing you’re blazed!




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