Edibles. They can take us on a crazy ride through some of the most powerful highs of our lives, or leave us feeling underwhelmed and a little sad. Sometimes we think we got a dud, and take more, only to realize that it hadn’t kicked in yet as the world begins to melt away and your body floats through the clouds.
For those who’ve been through it, or those who are curious, these are the 8 phases of taking an edible:
Phase 1: I Think I Feel Something… Maybe?
A lot of the time, the first though after taking an edible is “do I feel it?” And a lot of the time, when you ask yourself this question within the first few minutes of consumption, the truthful answer will be no. Most edibles take at least half an hour to an hour to take effect, but many users do feel a slight buzz right after consumption, perhaps due to the anticipation causing a placebo effect.
Phase 2: I Don’t Feel Anything
After the questioning period ends, and you come to realize that you are not, in fact, high yet, it can be a little disappointing. You begin to wonder if the edible you took really worked, or if you got jipped. Maybe your tolerance is too high? There’s still time for it to kick in, but you secretly think you may need more before you get to feel that sweet relief.
Phase 3: I Feel It.
Now you definitely feel it. You’ve gone from doubting the power of this edible, to doubting whether or not you should’ve eaten the whole thing. You’re melting into the couch and floating through the sky at the same time, all while trying to finish processing the thought you had five minutes ago. And this is only the beginning. Now you have to survive what feels like the most powerful high of your life.
Phase 4: Sensory Enhancement
This is the part where you notice your senses are stronger than usual. Things begin to smell better, taste better, feel better, and you begin to ponder your own existence. As the high sets in, you notice details about yourself and your environment you never did before. You ponder the meaning of life for a moment, before your mind switches gears yet again. You realize how soft the carpet feels, how amazing your favourite song really does sound, and how delicious some pizza would be right about now. Maybe some french fries too?
Phase 5: The Munchies
When the high is reaching its peak, the munchies begin to hit. All of the sudden your stomach starts to roar with the hunger of a thousand dragons that must be fed right at this very moment. There is no waiting for food, as you ransack the pantry and shove whatever you can find down your gullet whole, barely chewing, but noticing how exceptionally good it tastes right now. It can’t hurt to have one more bag of chips while you wait for those Pizza Pops to finish heating up, right?
Phase 6: Trying to Function While Totally Baked
Now that the high has settled in for the most part, you’re strapped in for the ride. You’re higher than a kite, and don’t expect to be coming down anytime soon, so all that’s left to do is enjoy yourself and attempt to function as best you can. Sure, it’s not always easy being human, especially when you’re this stoned, but somehow you manage to succeed anyways. (For the most part).
Phase 7: Passing Out
Once you’ve passed your peak high, everything begins to fade into sleep sooner or later. You can try and fight it all you want, but it will come for you, just like it always does. Edibles always end this way; there’s really no avoiding it in the long run. A nice, long sleep is almost always to be expected at the end of your edible high. If you’ve held out this long, I’m proud. It’s difficult not to just pass out as soon as the high gets intense, but you made it! You survived the first phases of ingesting cannabis, and you’ve earned a well-deserved power nap. Just for an hour. Or maybe more like three days.
Phase 8: The “Edible Hangover”
The “Edible Hangover” is when you wake up the day after taking an edible, only to find that you’re actually still pretty high. Sometimes even after what feels like the longest sleep you’ve ever had, there’s still some THC left in your system needing to be processed. Because of this, you’ll often notice that you wake up a little baked the morning after an edible adventure, and may feel like it takes longer to shake off the last remains of sleep, as the high starts to clear throughout the day. It’s like a wake and bake without having to bake!
Once the fog has finally cleared, and you can face the day with a fresh mind again, it’s time for the next round!